Brantaphobia
by BabybluesBabygirl
Summary: Result of too many geese at the park and our imaginations running wild due to boredom.
1. Evil Duck

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea to make Headmaster brantaphobic, he fears geese. I make nothing off this fic and own nothing else.

* * *

"What are you doing? We have to kill the level E!" Zero snapped, shooting and missing.

"If I don't move it won't see me!" Came a very meek squeak from the statue still Headmaster.

"What won't see you?" Zero finally hit the level E and turned to look at the Headmaster, following his gaze to a… Goose.

"The evil duck! It can't see me if I'm standing still!"

"You mean the goose?" Zero asked, stepping closer to said bird.

"Zero! What are you doing? No stop! Don't move, it can see you when you move!" Headmaster whispered fiercely, holding in his usual flaring.

"You're stupid." Zero walked up behind it, scaring it into running towards Headmaster, who in turn screamed shrilly like a young girl who saw a spider for the first time. Following the screams and flails of the excellent swordsman at leisurely pace, Zero smirked to himself, he couldn't wait for Halloween.

"Zero! Why was Headmaster screaming?" Yuuki asked, running towards him.

"He saw something he was afraid of."

"What did he see?" Yuuki asked concerned.

"A devil duck."

"You mean a goose?"

"Yes, a goose." Zero confirmed.

"So Headmaster is afraid of geese?" Yuuki asked confused.

"There's a name for that."

"What?"

"Crazy."

"No actually I believe it's called Brantaphobia." Came the smart ass reply from Kaname.


	2. Return of the Goose

**Brantaphobia**

**Return of the Goose**

"Zerorin! Time to get dressed for Halloween!" Headmaster Cross sang, twirling while throwing sparkles around, twirling. "You'll be so cute Zerorin and Yuuki-chan will matching and so cute and-"

"I have a costume already." Zero sighed, brushing glitter and sparkles off his uniform.

"Oh don't argue with me! You promised Zerorin! Uh what?" Headmaster blinked a few times, his hand relaxing and the glitter falling into a pile on the floor.

"Headmaster Cross, you wanted to see me? Ah am I interrupting?" Kaname asked, standing in the doorway.

"No, I'm just leaving to put the finishing touches on my costume for the party tonight." Zero smirked.

"Oh, isn't that what you wanted help with?"

"Yes you have a really good eye for detail and I think your expertise can be of great use to me. The costume is in my room and I'll need some help getting into it and Yuuki can't me with that."

"Oh right and this is pay you back for earlier. I would say thank you but you would shove it in my face." Kaname smirked.

"Of course, what are rivals for?" Zero asked snidely, a glint of evil amusement lurking in his amethyst eyes.

"Wait Zero, you have a costume and you need Kaname's help to put it on? It must be spectacular!" Headmaster resumed throwing glitter, now with a mixture of confetti too.

"Nutcase…" Zero muttered, leaving the office.

"And you're different?" Kaname asked, following.

"Yes, I'm a whole different crazy."

"Are you sure this isn't taking this too far?"

"He deserves it. Besides, I've always wanted to go down in Cross Academy History, this is how it'll be done."

"Zero…"

"Oh god, don't tell me you have always loved me and you want to fuck me and drink my blood."

"Oh I'm sorry, says the one who had a dream about drinking my blood?"

"Kaname…"

"Oh, so you feel the same way? Oh Kuriyu, we could have avoided all this nonsense you know."

"Try being a level D and you become immune to tablets, they don't do anything but make you sick and hungrier. Now imagine the sweet smell of the most power vampire around campus and the flames of hunger clawing at you constantly, ripping you apart, every second of every day. Tell me you wouldn't dream of tearing them apart just to taste what's forbidden but calls to your most hated instincts."

"You will be the death of yourself." Kaname commented after a moment.

"At least I'll die as a hunter and with pride. Zip me up and pass me my bill." Zero responded, completely indifferent.

"For Yuuki's sake, I would let you." Kaname said softly, Zero thought he was hearing things until he looked into brown eyes.

"Too bad it'll be a snow storm in hell before that happens."

"Or a blazing desert storm in Antarctica."

"Smart ass… Let's get this show on the road."

"After you mother goose."

"Shove it blood sucker."

"Bite me delinquent."

"OH Yuuki, you look fabulous!" Headmaster squealed twirling the young girl around, sparkles flying from both of them.

"Headmaster stop… Please I can't breathe…"

"Oh no Yuuki! Don't die! Breath, baby breathe! Daddy will give you mouth to mouth if I need to but please don't make me!"

"Headmaster I'm fine now… Please calm down…" Yuuki sweat dropped as he continued his ranting and dramatics.

"Hello Yuuki, Headmaster. Sorry to interrupt but Headmaster, I believe you need to come see this… I think we have a problem." Kaname smiled politely.

"Alright, what is it Kaname-san?" Headmaster asked, following him to the balcony.

"Look over there, it seems something is attracting them." Kaname pointed to a flock of geese, internally smirking as Headmaster tensed up.

"Well as long as they stay awake frm everyone I think we'll be fine. Might need to put a fence of some sort, some of the girls were complaining about a wild goose chasing them and biting their socks…" Kaname let Headmaster's voice slowly become blocked out, watching the man's body language and expressions until he turned to him with a very serious expression.

"What was that noise?"

"I'm not sure what you're talking about, I only hear the party and the geese." Kaname lied smoothly.

"Oh, I must not of gotten enough sleep last night." Headmaster turned back to the scene outside and Kaname watched as violet eyes tinting a dark red crept forward in their costume and squawked with glee.

Kaname would never ever hear anyone scream louder or girlier than Headmaster Kain Cross when scared by a Zero Kuriyu dressed in a grisly looking full body goose costume. And he would always remember when history was made.


End file.
